I would say I have a mid-range collection (10 eyeshadow palettes, 45 lip products, 4 blushes, etc.), but I’m a girl at a STEM college and none of my friends have is addicted to makeup. Either they don’t wear any makeup at all, or they only have one item for each staple. I’m so tired of being judged for spending my * own * hard earned money on makeup, instead of adding it to savings etc. I understand that saving for the future is crucial, but I save, and I don’t spend it irresponsibly like others assume. I always think and think for hours before deciding to buy a new product, and I love my collection. I own quite a lot of products because I like having a variety of options and I never buy anything that is replaceable with any of my old collectibles. How should I handle this ..? š
The first thing that came to mind was to tell them “I PAY MY BILLS, MY BILLS ARE PAID” (I apologize if you don’t get the reference).
Everyone has SOMETHING they spend money on that others disprove of. But honestly, it’s not their money, and it’s not their hobby. They really should be minding their business. How do they shame you? Does it just happen out of the blue?
Makeup is a hobby. Itās just a form of art that can be practical (for daily wear). People being mean about you liking makeup is like people being mean about you liking basketball or sewing or whittling. Itās not their place to judge what makes you happy in any capacity as long as youāre not causing harm.
Also, people judging you for a traditionally feminine interest is just straight up sexist. Your interest in makeup doesnāt make you any less capable (see Elle Woods lol).
Honestly I’d never get this either. Makeup is a hobby, just like how reading is a hobby, gardening is a hobby, etc. Having a hobby is HEALTHY. Time and money invested in your hobby is not a waste. People who obsess over making everything “beneficial” are just being a slave to the grind.
As long as you are spending responsibly, I don’t see why you should feel guilty over your interests, especially since they are personal to you – if they make you happy, they make you happy.
Frankly speaking, you don’t have a problem – people around you DO. And their problem is their inability on minding their own goddamn business.
Iām so over this nonsense with other people. I say toss some glitter on them and let them contemplate the consequences of their baloney.
(Ok not really, but boy it sounds satisfying)
āI could have bought drugs you know. You are welcome.ā šāāļø uuh or do 180 on THEIR spendings.š Troll them and hopefully they will stop.
What really helped me was this – give them lenghty speeches about how you buy makeup or talk about anything associated with makeup (how you went through your collection and you noticed that something was missing there. So you checked certain brands and compared them bla bla bla) ANY-THING! It will take little bit of time but once they learn that any topic about makeup means boredome (in their senseš¤”)they will naturaly avoid it. And tadaaa you are free to do as you wish.
Also I am sorry your friends donāt share same passion for makeup as you. I donāt have any makeup buddies myself but I found reddit is good place to compensate for it. š
you donāt have to justify the way you spend your own money to anybody, ever. everybody has their āviceā video games, alcohol, makeup, doesnāt matter; itās none of their business.
Hello, another girl in STEM here! I had a makeup subscription service for like 5 years, which has resulted in quite a bit of makeup. I also love makeup and trying new products. To me, my collection is kind of like my fiance’s video game collection, he buys a new game when he wants to play something new and I do the same with makeup. If your spending is within your own budget, you have no reason to be shamed for the makeup you have or continue to buy in the future.
You gotta remember that in a lot of peopleās minds, make-up loving girls = vapid, frivolous. That image clashes against the worldview STEM women have had to adopt to survive is such misogynistic fields (weāre more āeducatedā than that, aboveā such useless vanities). So here they are seeing two conflicting views of you and canāt reconcile it, so they reject the offending part and put you down for it. Itās a whole big thing… but letās not open that can of worms lol.
Just know that people are only just starting to catch on that you can be smart AND feminine. Itāll take a while till the rest of the world gets it, too. Just keep your head held high and keep liking what you like. Itās YOUR hobby and your finances are none of their business.
same here, I love makeup so much and I don’t even own that much, a couple blushes 10 eyeshadow palettes and a few face products that are mostly drugstore. I’m in college, and my parents always shame me for wasting my money on makeup even though I’ve only spent about $200 total, and I have a stable job and a scholarship that pays for college. I save and invest upwards 90% money that I earn from my job, so I dont care what they say. I don’t do drugs, or gamble or drink or waste it. I have a perfectly healthy amount and relationship with makeup, and thats all that matters. treating yourself is actually a good thing, so just ignore their comments
š they’re just jealous. If you’re satisfying your important financial commitments, you can do whatever you want.
I see my eyeshadow as a hobby that I use to express creativity. I have about 10 eyeshadow pallets three of which are gifted. I donāt think I have a problem. But every one else sees it as one lol. I donāt mind the initial questioning bc I know they are just saying it in good faith. However, if they continue to insist itās a problem I start getting annoyed and confused.
Just wanted to put my two cents in, I’ve been a technician in a biomedical lab for nearly 16 years now, I’m the only one who wears makeup at work, no one there has ever shamed me for it or said anything. I’ve spent probably thousands on it, and have literally tons of palettes and lipsticks, but my bills are paid so I really don’t care what people think, I don’t wear it for anyone else but myself. I used to care too much about other’s opinions but you know what, life really is too short to try and please everyone.
I just tell them if all my bills are paid,and I’m not asking you for money to do this, then quite frankly it’s really none of your business.
I used to try to explain or justify it but now I don’t bother anymore. I simply turn back their comments at their own hobbies. For example my SO did a remark once (we were having an argument and he was trying to be petty, he is usually fine with it and doesn’t put his nose in my stuff) I told him that I spent less or equivalent on makeup that he does on cigarettes, he moved the conversation to another subject pretty quickly šš and for people who do not know me enough in my opinion to be entitled to do a remark well a simple “and that harms you how exactly?” does the trick. I do have a though skin and don’t care much about most people’s opinion so that helps.
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Tell them to mind their business. Full stop. Next time someone makes fun of you for having makeup/buying new makeup, just simply straight out tell them that you arenāt asking for advice about your spending or hobbies, and that you arenāt interested in input about what you choose to spend time or money on. People will take all the liberties you let them, and we have all been conditioned that itās ok and ānormalā to judge and āroastā our friends, but it can be toxic.
You donāt owe anyone accountability for what you like, what you buy, or how you live. You donāt have to ādealā with it, you can simply, firmly, and kindly state that itās not something you care to discuss. If they persist in coming after you about it, theyāre not your friends, and you are also able to decide not to spend time around people who disrespect you and your boundaries.
I always looked at makeup as more of a hobby. I used to collect a lot of it and still do (not as much though). Whenever someone would mention all my makeup I just said it was a hobby and I had lot of fun with it, thatās how I chose to spend some of my extra money.
Just tell them some people collect figurines, some people collect makeup. A lot of it is viewed as collector items just the way art and other stuff is so.
I have a ton of makeup and my husband absolutely does not get it why do I need that much… But he knows it makes me happy and says I look amazing even when my make is absolutely crappy.
If they are your friends, they don’t need to “get it” but they should support you anyway, and if they don’t, get better friends